This is clearly going to date me, but like most young kids at the time, I remember being excited when the first Mortal Kombat movie came out. I sat through the film, dutifully, and enjoyed it but found myself highly intrigued by most of the music being played through several of the fight scenes. I remember feeling a chill up my spine and a slight adrenaline rush when I would hear the beats and synths kick in. Being a young boy and completely unfamiliar with dance music, I dismissed it as a natural reaction to the suspense of the film. It wasn’t until the final scene, I realized the rush of emotion and wave of euphoria I was experiencing had nothing to do with the film, but the music.
After some investigating, I discovered the name of the song that was playing in that final scene; a song that would forever change my life.
Orbital – Halcyon +on +on
I remember the haunting melody of the opening synths and pads, the vocal sample that was so ethereal, so magically surreal, I felt as if I was listening to some beautiful symphony from another world. I remember struggling through my freshman year of high school, listening to this song on repeat each night until I fell asleep. Its soothsayer properties seemed to be the only thing keeping me hanging on during a turbulent youth. I remember the flashes of wanting to end it all, and then hearing the familiar tonal voice of Halcyon assuring me, if I just kept listening, everything would be ok.
And I did.
I listened every night, over and over, until the hurt stopped long enough for me drift into sleep.
I remember meeting my first love, a childhood friend I was reunited with when I was 18, and us spending afternoons and late nights listening to this song, telling each other what we thought it meant, the same way children try to pick shapes and animals out of clouds. I remember holding her in my arms, making love to her while this track played over and over. Two young hearts intertwined in a moment of pure bliss and understanding set to a backdrop of symphonic melody made by machines and computers. This was truly the most this song could offer.
I remember how very wrong I was.
I remember never telling her how much I loved her, and once again listening to Orbital’s opus, feeling as if it was the only thing that could calm my mind and all the complexities of cutting yourself off from someone because you didn’t want to watch them kill themselves slowly with drugs.
I remember listening to this song until I felt the pain dull, never fade away, but dull to a point that life was barely livable again.
I remember the day I got the call from her father, telling me she had passed, and that her funeral was going to be the day of my 21st birthday, in another state, and I was going to be unable to attend. Once again I found myself wanting to end everything, and once again, the sad sweet song found its way to me. The warm harmonic arms wrapping me in a musical comfort and reassurance that I honestly don’t think any person could have offered.
I remember feeling like DJing and dance music, was the only real way I could ever truly say goodbye. I remember the first time I played Halcyon to a crowd, and the roar of approval from the small packed warehouse. I remember, for an instant, looking out into the small sea of faces, hoping, by some miracle to see her’s there, as if her death had been some horrific error, or bad practical joke.
I remember how each time I listened to this classic after that, how it inspired me to chase after the things I wanted; to never make the mistake of letting something go without giving it your honest to God best shot. The song seemed to take on a new life as if something was now showing me another layer of the masterpiece. Where before I heard sadness in its measures and meter, I now listened and heard hope.
I remember listening to this song the night before I landed my dream job, and it reassuring me that everything that needed to happen, would. I remember how over time the song’s very structure seemed to shift from a melancholy sweet sad tone, to one of a blissful optimism.
I know the song is, to understate, iconic. I know it’s graced almost every dance music lover of a certain age’s top 10 list, but for me, this track didn’t just change my life, it saved it.
Not only did it save my life, but it did so time and time again, and provides me hope for the future each time I listen to it.
I hope that someone out there can find the same solace, and inspiration in this treasured piece of music that I did.
Matthew is a well known and respected DJ and promoter based out of Houston, TX. Dunn has well over a decade behind the decks, played alongside some of the biggest names in dance music, and is a fixture in the EDM community both on local and international level.
